The Long and The Short Of It

Episode 170 - Favo(u)rite Things: 2021

Transcript:

Pete: Hey, Jen.

Jen: Hello, Peter.

Pete: Happy holidays. Happy almost end of year. Happy end of 2021.

Jen: Yay, we made it to the end of another year.

Pete: The strangest, longest, most bizarre year of all. We made it, team.

Jen: Truly.

Pete: We made it. So I thought that we could do a format that we've done a few times and that I know our listeners love, and it feels apt to do it at the end of the year, which is our favorite things. So, maybe we could do our favorite things of 2021.

Jen: Sounds good. These are a few of my favorite things. This is The Long and The Short Of It.

Pete: I want to say you've made that joke every time we've done this...

Jen: Yes.

Pete: ...and that I still enjoy it every single time.

Jen: Well, as a musical theatre nerd, I cannot pass up the opportunity to quote a classic.

Pete: I get it, I get it, I get it. Okay, so we've actually, listener, we have thought about this prior and come up with some categories. So the categories are: favorite book, both fiction and non-fiction (so favorite books, I guess); favorite podcast episode (with a twist); favorite documentary/film/TV show (whichever of the three, you decide); favorite new habit (excited for that one); and then, favorite new person (which was a fun one that you added, that I'm also really excited for). So, they are the categories. Would you like to kick off?

Jen: Sure thing. Favorite books read in 2021, even if they weren't published in 2021.

Pete: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Jen: Let's start with fiction.

Pete: Okay.

Jen: Okay, Pete.

Pete: You read one?

Jen: I know. Drumroll, please. Jen read fiction in 2021. Now, I didn't have a large group of options to choose from, but I did have more than one option to choose from because I read about seven or eight fiction books in 2021.

Pete: That's good.

Jen: Yes, all of them over the summer. That's my summer reading moment. And I messaged you on Slack like a thousand times about this book because I loved it so much: Where the Crawdads Sing by Delia Owens.

Pete: Yeah.

Jen: I loved it so much that when I finished it, I immediately went back to about the halfway point and reread the second half so that I could understand how she had constructed the unraveling of the mystery. And oh my gosh, what an extraordinary piece of writing. I felt like I was there. I had the full sensory experience of living in the world with those characters. And Reese Witherspoon is producing a film adaptation of it which is supposed to come out next year, and I cannot wait.

Pete: Mmm. Mmm, mmm, mmm. Yeah, I think that might have made my list last year, so I'm glad that you also had that experience of reading that book. That's quite a book. Okay, favorite fiction for me, is...I had a couple to pick from. I don't think I had seven, I only had a few. And I had a bit of trouble because I read a couple of really good ones. However, I've gone with a book called All the Shimmering Skies by an author called Trent Dalton, who is an Australian author. And it's a book set in a fictional version of the war, where the events transpire differently than what actually happened historically. And it follows the journey of this young girl called Molly, and her journey in sort of navigating that. I don't want to give away too much. It's just a really, really brilliant book. And I actually had to pull out a line or a couple of sentences because this is just like, to me, why the book was so good. Because there's actually all this wisdom in fiction books. Who knew, Jen? Who knew?

Jen: I know. I mean, I'm seriously kicking myself after enjoying my fiction reading experience so much.

Pete: Yeah.

Jen: We've got to read more fiction, Pete. We have to.

Pete: Right. So let me read you this, this is very short. It says, "Molly knows the secret to a long walk. Never think about the destination. Just think about the air in your lungs, the motion of your arms and legs. There is a rhythm to it, and once you have found it that rhythm can tick-tock through time forever."

Jen: Oof.

Pete: I mean, come on.

Jen: Love that.

Pete: Yeah. So: All the Shimmering Skies, Trent Dalton. And by the way, listener, we're going to put all of these in a Box O' Goodies. It's going to be an epic Box O' Goodies, so keep an eye out for that.

Jen: Yeah. So if you're not subscribed to the Box O' Goodies, definitely missing out. And you can do that at thelongandtheshortpodcast.com.

Pete: Yes. Okay. What about nonfiction? How many thousands of books did you have to pick from?

Jen: Well, I had a lot of books to pick from. And it was hard to pick my favorite. And as I was staring at my bookshelf trying to figure out which is the one that would be the one for 2021, this one kept coming back to me because I found it so fascinating. It is (and I might have mentioned it on the podcast while I was reading it) Predictably Irrational by Dan Ariely, subtitle is: The Hidden Forces That Shape Our Decisions. And I have heard him interviewed many times on many podcasts, and I've always been completely captivated by him. His personal story is so unbelievable. He was a severe burn victim, and spent a very long time recovering in a burn center. And so much of his work comes back to how might people have made decisions that would have helped him to avoid pain during his recovery.

Pete: Wow.

Jen: It's really incredible. You know, with a lot of these sciency books, you have a relationship...or I have a relationship to the material, but not necessarily to the author. But because he tells his personal story, and how traumatizing it was and how resilient he is, every piece of data that he shares has an emotional impact because you know a bit about the person sharing it. And I learned so much about human nature, and about myself, and about ways I might be able to help my clients from this book. I cannot recommend it highly enough, Predictably Irrational by Dan Ariely.

Pete: Mmm. Mmm, mmm, mmm. Great book. I actually read that on your recommendation as well. I had so much trouble picking one. But that's the nature of this format, we have to pick one. So, I've gone with a book that I'm sure many of our listeners have read. But for those that haven't, please run to a bookstore and pick it up right now. It's called Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott.

Jen: So good.

Pete: Who is...I think she's written twenty-something plus books. Like, she is prolific. And Bird by Bird is a book about the process of writing. And it is so hilariously, accurately, painstakingly, funny and wise that I just...ah, it really spoke to me. And once again, I actually had to pull out a couple of lines from it because I think it speaks to A: her writing style (which is really good), but B: the blend of accuracy and humor. So if it's okay-

Jen: Mm-hmm.

Pete: -and you'll let me indulge, I'm just going to read this. This is on the process of writing, she says, "You turn on your computer and bring up the right file, then you stare at it for an hour or so. You begin rocking. You look at the ceiling, and then over at the clock, you yawn, and stare at the paper again. Then, with your fingers poised on the keyboard, you squint at an image that is forming in your mind -- a scene, a locale, a character, whatever -- and you try and quiet your mind so you can hear what the landscape or the character has to say above all the other voices in your mind. The other voices are banshees and drunken monkeys. They are the voices of anxiety, of judgment, of doom, of guilt. There is a vague pain at the base of your neck. It crosses your mind that you have meningitis. Then the phone rings and you look up at the ceiling with fury, summon every ounce of noblesse oblige, and answer the call politely, with maybe just the merest hint of irritation. The caller asks if you're working, and you say yeah, because you are." And it goes on and on. But just like...I felt so called out by that whole paragraph. Of like, "Okay, I'm not the only one that stares at the ceiling, that rocks back and forward, that twiddles my thumbs." Yeah. So, such a good book.

Jen: Oh my gosh. I love that book. I think I read it in 2020, possibly. Maybe it was 2021. What is time, Pete? What is time?

Pete: Who knows? Who knows? Okay, so they were books. I know we spent a long time on books, but we just love books so much.

Jen: Okay. So next up, favorite podcast episode with a twist. So here's the twist, Pete. In past My Favo(u)rite Things episodes, we have shared our favorite podcast episode of someone else's podcast. What we're going to twist this time is, we're going to share our favorite episode of The Long and The Short Of It from 2021. (And P.S. listeners, we don't talk that much about the episodes after they're released, so this will be interesting.)

Pete: This will be fun. This will be fun. So I had a tie between two that came to mind. And maybe there's a theme in why they were the tie, but the first one was Episode 120, which was Seth Godin. Which is when you and I did something that we've not done for one hundred and seventy episodes, which was we had a guest on, which was Seth to talk about his book. And, yeah, I think it was fun because of the process of us doing a different format, but also just the insights that Seth shared. (I think we actually did a follow-up episode because our minds were melted, called Seth's Mind Melt or Post-Seth Mind Melt.) But the insights he shared, the way that he described things like his imposter syndrome and all of that, I just found so refreshing and joyful and fun. And he was quite honest and vulnerable. So listener, go back and have a listen to Episode 120.

Jen: Yes. Love it.

Pete: Yeah. And tied with that was, of course, when Pete Interviews Jen, which was Episode 100. And that was a favorite for me because I got to go like full Debbie Millman. Which, listener, if you're not familiar, is my favorite interviewer of all time. She has a podcast called Design Matters. And she does incredible amounts of research into her guests and surprises them with these questions. And they're always like, "What? How did you know that?" So, I had a great time. I was messaging your friends, your family, your husband, looking for stories and questions and insights. And I loved it. I loved it. So, they were my two favorite episodes of The Long and The Short Of It, 120 and 156. What about you?

Jen: Well, I also have two.

Pete: Okay.

Jen: And surprise, surprise, the first one is Episode 120, for all the reasons you mentioned. But the second one...it was kind of hard for me to pick. But the thing that I love that happens sometimes is when we make up a term and then other people start using it in conversation with me, unprompted by me. So, I decided I would pick my other favorite episode based on which random thing we made up has been repeated to me the most. And so, my favorite episode of 2021 is FOTU.

Pete: Yes, yes. Fear of the unknown.

Jen: Yes. That was Episode 159. And it was not that many episodes ago, it's just a couple months. But the number of people who have used FOTU in a sentence with me is kind of mind blowing.

Pete: That's amazing. That's amazing. FOTU, yeah.

Jen: Fear of the unknown.

Pete: Mmm. Mmm, mmm. Okay. What about favorite documentary/film/TV show? Have you got one?

Jen: Well, again, I didn't have a very large pool to pick from.

Pete: Me neither. Me neither.

Jen: But I imagine if I did have a larger pool, this still would have been my number one choice. Now maybe this will surprise you, but maybe not. I did binge a show this year.

Pete: No. You didn't.

Jen: Yes. I did. I did. I watched all six seasons...

Pete: Six seasons. What?

Jen: ...of a show called Alone, which is a reality show on the History Channel.

Pete: What? What. I am...I'm in shock. I've never even heard you talk about this show. What are you talking about?

Jen: So they take ten people who are survival-skill experts, and they drop them with no supplies except camera gear, and then they get to bring ten things from a pre-determined list. They drop them...the first four seasons or so were on Vancouver Island, and the last two episodes were literally in the Arctic. And they drop them there, and they have to survive with nobody. And the last person standing wins. Now listeners, maybe I've shared this before. I'm obsessed with people who survive. Like, it's crazy how obsessed I get digging into what it takes for someone to overcome outrageously challenging conditions. So for someone to survive one hundred days with no supplies in the Arctic, that is my jam.

Pete: Wow. I need a moment to recover. I did not know this about you. It explains all of the books on Mount Everest that you have though, right?

Jen: That's right.

Pete: Huh. Okay. Alright. Well, similarly, I had a very small pile to choose from. But there was a documentary...I guess it was a documentary. It's sort of like a documentary/stand-up/musical performance by a comedian by the name of Bo Burnham. And the documentary is called Inside, and the premise is he filmed an entire stand-up comedy set with music (because he's a musician as well) in the confines of a very small studio apartment in America whilst quarantining, whilst in lockdown. And it's hilarious, and kind of dark, and sad, and quite touching at times.

Jen: It is dark.

Pete: Yeah. Because you watch his mental health just completely decline. And he's singing about it and he's joking about it, but it's like, "Oh my god, this guy is in a really bad headspace." And I think you could almost say I binged it because I watched it three times in forty-eight hours after I watched it the first time. I went back and watched it again. And then I was like, "Tracy, you have to watch this. We have to watch it again." And I watched it again. And it, I don't know, something about it really shook me in a good way, delighted me in other ways. Yeah, it was just...it was so profound. I found it really profound. Yeah.

Jen: Now I watched that based on your recommendation and I have to say, what he was able to accomplish with the equipment that he had, in the size room he had, was absolutely astonishing. But I had to watch it in chunks. I couldn't watch the whole thing in one sitting. Because like you said, you really like...depending on what your own mental health is like on that day, you can either take it, or you need to take it in chunks.

Pete: That's so true.

Jen: It's intense.

Pete: Yeah, it is. It is.

Jen: He's a genius.

Pete: He is a genius. And just, like you said, the quality of output with...like, he's like in one room with one wall. It's remarkable. Anyway, I highly recommend it. Highly recommend it. So, that's my documentary.

Jen: Okay. Up next, Pete...I don't think we've ever done this before: favorite new habit.

Pete: Okay, yeah. So when you said this, I knew immediately what it would be. And then I think I followed up with, "Huh, it's a little strange and quirky, potentially," but it's a new habit. So, let me share. There's a brilliant book I read this year called Breath by James Nestor. And it's on the power and research behind, essentially, the way that humans breathe. And among many findings, the main thing that he discovered was just how few humans breathe properly. And how, you know, really distilling that down to the insight I gleaned, which was: we breathe through our mouths far too much. And in actual fact, we should be breathing through our nose. And there's a whole bunch of science and research, and he goes through experiments. And he puts himself through these sort of horrific, at times, experiments where he's not allowed to breathe through his mouth, and he's only allowed to breathe through his mouth, and they measure all of the things. Anyway, the habit I picked up from that is nose-breathing.

Jen: Mm-hmm.

Pete: And I've literally been training that skill every single day since I read it about six months ago. And it's remarkable how my sleep has improved, my energy has improved, my like throat soreness has improved. It's crazy. So nose-breathing has been my new habit, and one that I'll be sticking with. I highly recommend the book. (Told you it was a bit random.)

Jen: Well, Pete, now that you are a nose-breather and have focused on breathing, it is time to get you into voice lessons, because you have conquered the first step in singing.

Pete: No. Oh right, of course. I bet all of our listeners in the musical world are like, "Of course, Pete. Duh."

Jen: No. I think we're now planning to recruit you.

Pete: No. No, no, no. No one needs that.

Jen: And coming to a Broadway stage near you, Peter Shepherd.

Pete: Nobody needs that. Nobody needs that. Okay. What about your habit? What was your habit, Jennifer?

Jen: So, my habit is...it brings me joy to even think about it. This year, I started scheduling a standing date with people I wanted to talk to more regularly. So in the Pete Interviews Jen episode, we talked about my mentor, Mary Corsaro.

Pete: Mm-hmm.

Jen: We decided that we wanted to talk to each other more, so we have a standing monthly catch-up to get on the phone. And our mutual friend, the new Director of Student Experience at Akimbo, JaLeesa Beavers and I, we talk every Wednesday because we wanted to stay close. And the pandemic was really making me realize I was drifting, and the people who I love deserve a higher priority in my life. So getting people on the calendar for regular phone dates has been my new habit, and I love it.

Pete: Well, I'm obsessed with that. And to be a fly on the wall with you and JaLeesa...my gosh, I would pay money for that. I would pay money.

Jen: She is brilliant.

Pete: Yes. Yes, yes, yes. Okay. Our final category, Jennifer: favorite new person. (This is such a fun one that you came up with.)

Jen: It's funny, I came up with it and then I had no idea how to answer it-

Pete: Do you want to try?

Jen: -and then all of a sudden, it came to me. No, it came to me.

Pete: Okay.

Jen: Okay. Now maybe this is a little bit of a cheat because I knew this person existed, but I actually met this person in 2021.

Pete: Mmm.

Jen: So I'm kind of stoked about having the idea for this category, because this means I get to plug one of my favorite people in the world on this podcast. Let me tell you a little story. I went to the final dress rehearsal for the reopening of the Broadway company of Hamilton. And while I was sitting there, I saw someone (fully masked) walk into the theater. And I went, "Oh my god, that is Dr. Dolly Chugh," author of The Person You Mean to Be: How Good People Fight Bias, and also the author of my favorite monthly newsletter. And I started to fangirl a little bit. And then after the show, I got to meet her and have a real life, real human conversation. And you know, when people say, "Don't meet your heroes, because they'll disappoint you," those people (turns out) were wrong. She exceeded all expectations. So, my favorite person of 2021: Dr. Dolly Chugh.

Pete: Those people have never met Dr. Dolly Chugh. I love it. Okay. Mine was a little cheaty too, in the sense that I guess I met/knew this person existed in 2020, but I never got to hold him. My little baby nephew.

Jen: Aww.

Pete: My little baby nephew, Zeno, who I got to meet for the first time in April of 2021...and have since not been able to see since because of COVID and whatnot. But I got to meet and hold and pinch the cheeks of my favorite person of 2021, which was my nephew. Zeno. So, that would be my favorite person of 2021. And I'm excited to hang out with him again next year, hopefully.

Jen: Oh my gosh, that's the best answer ever. What an utter delight. Babies make everything better, don't they, Pete?

Pete: Yeah. Yeah.

Jen: Oh my gosh.

Pete: They just give you a little bit of hope.

Jen: And just the look of love in their eyes when they look at you, and the laughter, and...ah, it's just the best. It's the best. I'm so glad you got to experience that.

Pete: Yeah. Wow, so that's it, huh? 2021.

Jen: That's the list. These are a few of our favorite things. Listeners, if you check any of those favorite things out and have thoughts about them, we would love to hear from you. hello@thelongandtheshortpodcast.com is how you can reach us.

Pete: We would love to hear from you. We appreciate each and every one of you tuning in this year during the craziness that was 2021. And we have some very exciting new projects, updates, episodes coming for you next year in 2022. So we look forward to being in your ears, and hearing from you on the emails and on the Instagrams in the next year. Thanks for listening.

Jen: Happy New Year, everyone. That is The Long and The Short Of It.