The Long and The Short Of It

Episode 371 - Shark Week

Transcript:

Jen: Hello, Peter.

Pete: Hey, Jen.

Jen: I don't know if this is a thing in Australia.

Pete: What a start.

Jen: But over here in the United States of America, during the summer, we have something called Shark Week. Do you have Shark Week?

Pete: No. However, I also know what you're talking about. Like it's not really a thing here, but we probably have heard it referenced in movies and cultural conversations that relate to America. So, I think I know what you mean.

Jen: Okay. Well, this week I want to talk about Shark Week.

Pete: Shark Week. Oh my god, random. This is The Long and The Short Of It.

Pete: So, Shark Week.

Jen: Yep.

Pete: My understanding of this is a week of celebrating sharks, that looks like a bunch of documentaries and TV shows and movies that relate to sharks. Is that right?

Jen: That's right.

Pete: Is that it? Oh my god, I got it. I got it. I did it.

Jen: That's exactly right, Pete. And Shark Week is hosted by the Discovery Channel. And people get really in to Shark Week.

Pete: Oh my god.

Jen: Like, there are some people who cancel their life for Shark Week. They love Shark Week so much.

Pete: No. No.

Jen: Yes. People love Shark Week. So today I was listening to one of my favorite podcasts, Christopher Kimball's Milk Street Radio, which is all about cooking. And this episode today was featuring a baker named Erin Jeanne McDowell.

Pete: Alright.

Jen: And she is known for baking many wonderful things. But specifically, the book that put her on the map was her book, The Perfect Pie.

Pete: Okay. The Perfect Pie. Shark Week. I'm so confused.

Jen: Now, you might be looking for the correlation here. I'm about to get there. So the interviewers say to her, "Okay, Erin, what season of the year is the best season for pies?" And she said, "I can't possibly answer that because my philosophy is to live every week as if it's Shark Week." Meaning, pies are good all the time and you should not designate a single season to enjoy a pie.

Pete: Right.

Jen: Pies are enjoyable three-hundred-and-sixty-five days of the year. Live every day as if it's Pie Day. Live every week as if it's Shark Week.

Pete: Alright, alright. Let me see if I follow. Shark Week is an awesome, exciting week that we go wild for. And there is an opportunity to get excited about every other week. Why do we wait for a week that's dedicated to sharks by the Discovery Channel to live our life as if it's not Shark Week? Is that what we're saying here?

Jen: That's right. Now, Pete, this simple statement of, "Live every week like it's Shark Week," spoke to my soul.

Pete: Oh my god, tell me more.

Jen: Because people who know me really well will know, I find some things about our holiday system to be quite arbitrary and I'm not into it.

Pete: Alright.

Jen: And I also find that there are certain times of year where we pay attention to things because of the time of year, but it's so arbitrary and it would be so much more meaningful to pay attention to these things all the time. For example, Pete, goal setting.

Pete: Right.

Jen: Now, you and I will definitely do a goal setting episode in January, because that's when the rest of the world is paying attention to goal setting. But I say, live every week like it is Resolution Week and Goal Setting Week. Why do we have to wait until the first week of January? This just really spoke to me in a sort of whimsical way, and I really like it.

Pete: I like whimsical. I like it, too. So, don't wait for arbitrary dates / moments to do certain things. If they serve you, do them now. If they benefit you, why wait until the first of January? Yeah, I like this.

Jen: And then, I think there's another angle on it, too. Which is, you don't have to pretend that you don't like sharks the other fifty-one weeks of the year. You could be a shark lover all year round. You can like the things you like all the time. And you don't have to wait for everyone else to say they like it too, for you to like it.

Pete: You know, I love podcasting with you. Because you say things and I remember things that I haven't thought about for five years, like my good friend T.K. Coleman, who, gosh, I haven't spoken to for a couple of years now. But T.K. Coleman...I'm going to put a link to T.K. Coleman in the Box O' Goodies. He is a thinker, author, podcaster, coach, founder, extraordinary human being. And one of the quirks about T.K. Coleman that I often used to laugh about and love about him is, I mean, he lives this philosophy. T.K. Coleman listens to Christmas carols all year round, because he freaking loves Christmas carols. And I remember working with him, and it would be like the middle of May, and he's got a Christmas carol playlist going on in the background while he's doing some work. It's like, "What are you doing? Why would I wait until December? I love this music. I don't want to have to wait until December."

Jen: Oh my gosh, yes. T.K., live every season like it's the holiday season.

Pete: Yeah, Christmas carols. Oh, that's good. Alright. So how, where, why do we apply this to? I'm trying to think of other examples. How can I use this, this idea? Okay, so now I'm trying to think of what is my equivalent or what's another example of Christmas carols? What's another example of Shark Week or goal setting? These are, I think, good examples of when we wait for an arbitrary date to do something that actually would benefit us if we did it today, as opposed to waiting. What are the things that bring us joy or that benefit our work that we wait to...? One of the things I know about running a business and people that run businesses like mine, consulting, coaching, leadership development, whatever you want to call it, is we usually get into our line of business because we love doing the work. We love being in the room, facilitating a group of really smart people. We love being in a one-on-one coaching those people. We love being on stage, giving a keynote. Great. And maybe we love less the working on the business part. And I have seen, sadly, so many friends and colleagues and people that I just know end up giving up on their business or not having as successful a business as they could have because they just wanted to do the work and they didn't want to work on the business. Or what sometimes happens (and I get into this trap too) is you go, "Oh, I'll get to the working on the business part once I've finished this great project. I'll wait until it's Reach Out Week," which is an arbitrary thing I just made up. But usually, that happens when my project's finished. And I'm like, "Oh, when's my next project? It's Reach Out Week, all of a sudden."

Jen: Right.

Pete: As opposed to, well, what if you reached out once a day? What if you had this practice that you worked on the business every single day or every single week, regardless of whether you had a huge amount of business or a huge project that you're working on or not? That, that becomes a standard practice for you.

Jen: That feels like a very practical lens to put on this. And maybe what we need to do is sort of explode all the lenses. Because I think she's talking about a passion lens. You're talking about a practical lens. What we're looking at is how to bring more of the things that we want or need in our life, on a more consistent basis. That's a completely legit take on this.

Pete: Yeah.

Jen: I was also thinking, in the theater, sometimes you hear actors in long- running shows (I've been one of those actors) start to feel a little bit stale about doing the show for the five-hundred-and-seventeenth time, or something like that.

Pete: Yeah. I mean, that's the part of your world that I can't quite wrap my head around, like doing that same thing in those same lines over and over.

Jen: And a really helpful reframe is to remind yourself that even though opening night was five-hundred-and-seventeen performances ago, for this audience who has never been together in this theater before, as this particular audience seeing this particular show, this is their opening night. And then, it just immediately puts a spring in your step, where it's like, "Woah. Okay." So, treat every performance as if it's opening night. Not with the nausea and the pre-show vomits, but with the clarity that like, "I'm so in love with what I get to do, and I'm so excited to share it with people." That, that can be a daily practice.

Pete: Nice. I like that a lot. One of the things I grapple with at times is repeating myself in workshops and being caught in my own head of like, "Oh, I've told this story so many times about why coaching is effective," or, "I've told this story about having a difficult conversation," or, "I've told that story about that person that fell asleep in my workshop so many times." And yet, the people in the room haven't heard it, usually. Because I'm not talking to the same people. I'm talking to an entirely different audience. So that idea of it's maybe the five-hundredth time for you but it's the first time for them, that's energizing. I like that. It's Shark Week for them. Get excited. It's Shark Week.

Jen: Exactly. I'm obsessed with the Shark Week metaphor because it's like so clear.

Pete: And fun. Yeah.

Jen: And it's so niche. And yet, here during Shark Week, a lot of people are talking about Shark Week. So, maybe it's not so niche.

Pete: That's so ridiculous. Yeah. It's like, we're getting excited about this thing that, I mean, you could watch Jaws and a shark documentary any time of the year.

Jen: That's right.

Pete: We wait for this one specific week to go, "Shark Week!"

Jen: And then, I wonder, what is the flip side of this? If I, for example, decided that every day is Cinnamon Roll Day, wouldn't I eventually get sick of cinnamon rolls or not think they're that special? I really do only allow them to come into my life on a very sporadic basis, because I like the feeling that they're special and reserved for particular moments.

Pete: Yeah, the protection of certain events or things as being special. Cinnamon rolls is a good example. I think about it as like, prior to having kids, Tracey and I would go out for dinner on a weekend, and frequent a nice restaurant and have a glass of wine. And almost to the point where I think you kind of take it for granted a little bit because you get to do it every weekend. And now it's like this special monumental occasion that happens rarely when you get a babysitter. And you're like, oh, this feels like a mini Shark Week because we get to go out for dinner. So not to do that every day or every week because it loses its impact.

Jen: And then, there's another flip side of this, Pete. So, I think everyone who has listened to this show for a while knows that I follow Gretchen Rubin's work. I really enjoy her work. One time on her podcast, this was a couple of years ago, she made this public commitment to wear her clothes. Because she had all these nice clothes in her closet, but she never wore them because she was waiting for the right occasion. And so like, every day she was walking around in her yoga pants and her T-shirt. And she was like, "Every day for one year, I'm going to wear my clothes." And that's like a flip side of this, that if you treat something as so special that you can't engage with it, it just stays hanging in your closet.

Pete: Jen, that's me. That's me. That's what I do.

Jen: Oh my gosh. Is that why you're covering your face?

Pete: I am. I'm like, "I do that." That's exactly what I do. I have this lovely new shirt and pants that I'm saving for the right keynote or the right workshop. And then, the workshop will come around, and I'll be like, "I'll wear this other thing that I normally wear," or, "I'm working from home. I don't need to put it on." You know? That's me. I absolutely have a cupboard full of nice clothes that I very rarely wear. That is so funny. Oh my god.

Jen: And then, the sidebar about that is when you're on stage delivering a keynote, you want to feel like yourself. And so, if you're wearing clothes you haven't worn before, you don't feel like yourself. So you should definitely wear those clothes, Pete.

Pete: Exactly. That is so funny. So funny. Oh my god. Pete's being called out.

Jen: So, treat every outfit like it's a Shark Week outfit.

Pete: Shark Week outfit. What do you wear when it's Shark Week? Get that outfit on now. I love it. It feels a little bit like one angle is, what are the things in your life that give you energy? What are the things you get excited about? And how can you do more of those? Or how can you spend more time in those things? Like if the thing that you get most excited about is an arbitrary week where they play shark documentaries on TV, how can you not let it be a thing that only happens once a year? But also, balancing that tension of not overdoing it, like we talked about. How can you start to spend more time on the things that give you energy, is essentially what I'm thinking, and less time on the things that don't give you energy?

Jen: I guess today I'm like, "And on the flip side...," that's my catchphrase of the day. And on the flip side of that, what if...I'm thinking about tax season right now, here. It's the worst. It's the worst. You lock yourself in your home for a couple of days, and it looks like someone came in and dropped bags and bags of receipts and papers and this and that, and your eyes are crossing, and you just can't deal with it anymore. But if you treated every week like it was Tax Week, then when Tax Week came, it would take you five minutes.

Pete: Right. Yeah. That's fair. It also feels annoying though.

Jen: Oh, it's the worst.

Pete: Okay. So apart from putting on my Christmas carols once we've finished this call, what do I do with this? I'm keen to understand for myself, where in my life am I putting off positive experiences that give me energy because of some arbitrary date? That feels like something worth chewing on.

Jen: Yeah. And then, Pete, there's even one more angle on this. Which is, to the pie maker's point, she is already living every week like it's Shark Week when it comes to pies. Is there a place in your life (I can think of a place in my life) where you're already nailing this and you are doing a great job loving the things you love? For me, every week is Tony Week. I will go see a bunch of shows every week. I do not reserve it for Tony Season. Every week is Tony Week. Take me to the theater. I'm not going to put those experiences off until it's hip to go. I'm going now.

Pete: Yeah. Jen's going to keep going to the theater. There's a listener out there that's about to fire up a shark documentary, I just know it. T.K.'s got the Christmas carols going. And I'm going to start thinking about where I might start to insert a little more shark into my week.

Jen: And that is The Long and The Short Of It.