The Long and The Short Of It

Episode 67 - 2020

Transcript:

Jen: Hello, Peter.

Pete: Hey, Jen.

Jen: I haven't seen you since last year!

Pete: Last decade, even. Last decade.

Jen: Oh my goodness. Well, I hope your 2020 is off to a great start.

Pete: So far, so good.

Jen: I would love to talk about how you are kicking off your 2020 to a great start.

Pete: Hmm, interesting. A little review and reflection type exercise, maybe.

Jen: Yep, let's do it. For the first time in 2020, this is The Long and The Short Of It.

Jen: Alright, so many ideas to share, but I thought I would kick us off with this. A couple weeks ago, I was on a call with a bunch of clients, and the conversation turned to theme words for the year. And people were sharing, "My theme for 2020 is... And my theme for 2020 is...". And I'm curious to know, first of all, do you do that? And second, what did you pick?

Pete: I love this. I didn't know this had spread to all the way to New York City. So, a good friend of mine and changemaker in Australia, Mary Freer, has this exercise that she's walked me through around...so she does this often in a workshop setting. But she also, like...we all did it at the end of last year, I guess. So I haven't done it for this year yet, I did it for 2019. Mary's exercise is she lays out all of these words on a big table, just one, like, one word. And they're like scattered, and they're laminated, and they look really pretty. And the idea is you, like, see which ones you're drawn to. And you pick usually like between one to three. And that becomes your word of...you know, you might do it once a month, you might do once a quarter, or you might do it once a year. And so I did this exercise with Mary and a few other friends at the start of 2019. And I wrote down my two words on my whiteboard, and they stayed there for the entire year. And I stared at them every single morning. And I thought about what they mean to me every single morning. And I think it was quite helpful, and quite useful, and I think I embodied the two words quite well.

Jen: What were they?

Pete: Well, this is what I'm getting to. I'm just building up the suspense.

Jen: The suspense is killing me!

Pete: So the first word...I feel a little vulnerable even saying this, but let's do it. The first word was "World-Class", which I know is two words. And so, I don't know if we've mentioned this on the podcast, but there was an interview I heard with someone years ago who talked about this idea of being world-class at everything you do. And she took it as far as like when she does the photocopying, she's like, "How can I be a world-class photocopier? Or when I'm making dinner, how can I make dinner in a way that's world-class?". Essentially, trying to bring this idea of world-class into all of your actions. And I really liked that. I was like, I'm obsessed with this idea of: If you're going to do things, do things really well.

Jen: I love it.

Pete: So "World-Class" was my first word/two words. And then the second was...I think it was a little bit of recency bias, because I was literally reading Brene Brown's Dare to Lead in the moment I did this exercise, and it was "Rumble". And so the idea of a rumble is to have sort of uncomfortable, brave, difficult conversations and lean into them, if and when they're required, and not hide from the hard parts. And again, I think I did that pretty well this year. It was scary, it was terrifying, and it was joyful, and all the above...which we sort of talked about in the Aha Moments episode. But yeah, they were my two words of 2019. And I found it really useful. Have you, have you, like, done something like this before?

Jen: I haven't done anything that official. But I was inspired by the conversation I was having with my clients, and also had been finding a focal point for 2020. And so it felt like a bunch of ideas came together in that moment, and I did pick...I guess you would call it a theme for the year, but it's really an action for the year- something that I had already been pointing toward, but now I've said it out loud to a lot of people, and I guess I'm about to say it out loud on the podcast...

Pete: Say it, tell me. What is it?

Jen: So, I hope this makes sense. "Leak the Content" is my theme for 2020. As I shared in the Aha Moments episode, I had an aha moment about needing to lift the walls a bit at the studio, and allow some of the content to get outside of the four walls. And I was really trying to come up with an image that would satisfy two things: one, protect the people within the studio and keep them safe within the walls, and then also allow things to get outside the walls. So when I thought about a dam, and poking holes in the dam...what is inside and the people inside are still protected, but the juicy content is getting outside the walls.

Pete: The leak.

Jen: So that's my intention for 2020, is to be more generous in terms of how I'm sharing content, and with whom.

Pete: I love it. It's such a typical Waldman-ism to have a very visual phrase too, like leak. And you've already thought about the dam. And you've thought about how that's going to, like, drip out...as opposed to just like "Share Content", which is probably what I would have done. Okay, I like that.

Jen: Have you thought of what it's going to be for you, for 2020?

Pete: No, I actually, like, I'm thinking about this right now. Because I'm recognizing usually what I do...my process is usually, at some point in the first week of January, I will do like a review of 2019, and then, like, think about words, and ideas, and actions for 2020, I guess, this year. But in this moment, I haven't actually, I haven't actually done that because we're recording this a few days early. So, I'm trying to think about it right now. But I also don't want to, like, fast-track it because I like to do a few things (which I'm happy to talk through), in order for me to get there.

Jen: Yeah, could you actually talk us through what your process is? Because as it's the first week of January, perhaps some of our listeners would like to employ your methods.

Pete: Okay, yes. So, I know you think that...this is such a fun conversation because for you this is like, the dates are arbitrary, right? Because you're a Questioner. So I'm grateful that you're like leaning in.

Jen: But there's a, there's a lot of good research about what it means to start fresh. So I accept that the beginning of the year, the beginning of any period of time is a great time to start something.

Pete: Yeah. Okay, so my process...I've used, I've done this process for the last, I want to say three or four years. I iterate it a little bit. Like, last year I added the words, which I hadn't done before. But generally what I do is I start with a review. And so what I'll do is I'll look through two things. One is I look through my calendar, my Google Calendar, back through the year, and I make a note of anything that brought me joy, or like was something that was memorable in a good way, in a positive way. And then on the other side, I'll make a note of, like, things that like drained me a little bit, that might be in my calendar. And then I was like, "Ugh, I wish I didn't have to do that, or didn't go to that thing, or do that activity.". So, I start there. Oh actually...I said two, two places I review, I just realized there's three. So, the second is my photo reel in my phone. I have an assertion that the only time I really get my phone out to take a photo is when there's something joyful, or interesting, or fun in front of me that I feel I want to capture. And so going through that reminds me of those things. And again, I just like write them down as a list. And this is like no filter, just writing them down. What do I see? Do I see...? Or like, every second day there was a photo of a coffee. So obviously, just having a quiet moment to have a coffee was something that was interesting. So I just write this down. And then the third one I do, which I think is perhaps the most interesting place to review is...we've talked before about the Five Minute Journal, which is a...

Jen: Yeah.

Pete: ...product from Intelligent Change. And so essentially, for those that aren't familiar, the Five Minute Journal is something that you do in the morning. And it asks you, "What are three things you're grateful for? What are three things that would make today great? What's an affirmation?". And you do that. The idea is you do that over five minutes in the morning, and then at night you actually revisit it, and it's, "What are three awesome things that happened today? And what's one thing you could do better?". So, I actually go back and I read all of the things I was grateful for, all of the things I said were awesome, and then all of the things that I think I could have done better. And I try and find themes, essentially. And there are always themes. And it's always like, it's always really interesting to see the things that we're grateful for...or that I'm grateful for, sorry, to use myself as an example. I always, like, relate it to a conversation I had with Jen, or a connection I had with a friend in a cafe, or like going for a swim at the beach. They're never expensive. They're never huge giant plans that I've made. They're always like these really simple moments. And so once I've written down all these themes, I look at them and go, "Okay, well, how do I create more of the moments of joy, and less of the moments of, like, frustration, or the ones that didn't bring me joy?". So I just want to pause there, to say that's like part one of my process. Does that make sense?

Jen: Yes, yes. And P.S., I have the Five Minute Journal, and I've used it, but never religiously. And the way you just described that, I feel like I can commit.

Pete: Oh my gosh.

Jen: Yes. Because you know, once upon a time, I said I was looking for a night-time ritual, a closing ritual.

Pete: Yeah.

Jen: And because it's built-in, I feel like I could commit to this and have a new addition to my morning routine, and then have (just by default), an evening routine.

Pete: I like it. Yeah, yeah. And yeah, I think that there's more...it's more interesting to me now that I have this artifact at the end of the year to look back on, to look at the things that... Because it's so easy to get caught up in, "Oh, I need my business to earn more money.". Or, "I need to be doing more of this thing.". Or, "I need to buy this thing over here.". And when you look through the things that you're grateful for, and the things that are awesome, they're never commodities, like never. It's so interesting. And so I just like use that as a reminder, and an artifact for myself to focus on certain things like relationships, friendships, connections with other people in interesting ways. So there's that. It is a little bit of a...I feel like this could be a confronting process for a lot of people. They're like, "Wow, he really thinks through this end of year thing.". The other thing I like to do is I usually send an email to my Square Squad. So Brene Brown Square Squad, which is a very small piece of paper that has the list of the people who's opinions matter to you, essentially. And I'll usually send them an email that says something along the lines of, "What do you think I did well last year? And what should I do more of? Or, what should I do better next year?". And that is always very interesting, to get that. So this is like, I collect all of this data and information from the last year. And then I look at it, and try and find themes. And I basically think about, "What do I want to focus on, knowing all of this information?". And last year, how I did that was I'll come up with two words that relate to that. So I might do something similar this year, but I like the idea of them being actions.

Jen: Yeah, me too. Because then you know if you're doing it, or not.

Pete: Right, yeah. And I like the idea of it being a really, like, visceral metaphor, like "Leaking the Content". I've gotta come up with one of those. So it's pretty intense and exhaustive, I know. Is...have you got a, do you have a process of reflection, or are you just like...?

Jen: Yes. I tend to review at multiple points throughout the year. I'm more of like a quarterly sort of person. Because I like to make a lot of adjustments on what I'm working toward. But I will say that part of my reviewing process is, as you know, I look far into the future. So I have just, I guess you could say, completed my future planning, just looking at what the next twelve months looks like. Typically, I'll be working on one major project in each quarter. And I had a little heart flutter moment because the front half of 2020 has one project too many. And I'm trying to figure out what to do with that. So the next couple weeks for me are going to be about managing my resource of time, and making sure that I have all the resources that I need in order to make good on what I have said "yes" to, and figure out how to make that work. So I'm less about the looking back, right now, and more about the looking forward to make sure that I'm setting the year up for success.

Pete: Love it. So you just sparked a thought in me...two thoughts, from two resources that I think relate to all of this, that I've come into contact with recently. And I think this will probably form part of the action that I decide for next year, for this year, sorry. And so one of them comes from Adam Grant, who did a, just a brilliant, brilliant interview recently on the Tim Ferriss podcast.

Jen: It was so good.

Pete: My goodness. I listened to it immediately, like back-to-back, immediately after I'd finished it the first time because it was so good. One thing that (this wasn't what I was going to say), but the idea of Manager Days versus Maker Days is something I'm thinking about for 2020. Which is, it reminded me of what you talked about in our Seasons episode, of having like seasons that might be monthly, or quarterly. And he took this to the micro, where he said he has certain days of the week, which are what he calls Maker Days, which is essentially, "I'm offline, but I'm like, being creative. I'm building stuff. I'm being proactive.". And then other days, which are Manager Days, which are like, "I'm replying to emails. I'm doing the admin. I'm doing all those nitty-gritty manager tasks.". And so I like the idea of saying, "Every Monday is a Maker Day," or something. So I'm, I don't know what that looks like. But I'm thinking about that. That was a side note. The two points that I think about, as you reflect on looking forward for 2020...one was from the Adam Grant podcast, and he talks about this idea of productivity being overrated. And that usually, well, his assertion is it's not that we have a productivity problem, it's that we have a project problem. And that we're focusing on the wrong projects, if we're so worried that we can't be productive within those projects. And his idea was, we should be picking projects that we just, like, have no effort or tension against starting, or doing it, or like being in flow. And so I'm thinking about that a lot. Of how do I prioritize, or pick projects that are projects I want to work on, as opposed to ones you feel like you have to? Thinking about that, and then tying it in to...the guy that does the Dilbert comic, his name is Scott Adams, is a really, really interesting, kind of contrarian thinker. And I just read his, re-read one of his books called, How to Fail at Almost Everything and Still Win Big. That's what the book's called. And something he talks about in there is- essentially, when it comes to prioritization in like, on the macro view in your life, you should only prioritize things that give you energy. Like, that should be your, that's your macro focus. And so he talks about that being like health and exercise. But then like the work that you do, it should be work...and relationships with people who energize you. That maximizing your energy should be the sole focus of everything you do in your life. And so I'm thinking about what that looks like in 2020.

Jen: Ooh, maybe you've just landed on a theme: "Maximize Your Energy".

Pete: Yeah.

Jen: I like it.

Pete: I want to come up with an interesting metaphor for it, though. That's a bit boring.

Jen: Mm-hmm. Oh, sorry . [laughter]

Pete: I wasn't saying you're boring. [laughter] They were my words.

Jen: I want to share with our listeners...when I do the look ahead exercise, look at the next twelve months, the way I do it is on a single sheet of paper. I have an entire year represented on one sheet of paper. And essentially, down the left side of the page are the months, and across the top, moving left to right, are the days of the month. And they're blank, I write them in by hand, because I re-do them a lot.

Pete: Wow.

Jen: And what I have learned for myself is that if the page is full, I've got a problem.

Pete: Interesting.

Jen: So, essentially what I'm representing on the one page are the ship dates for the year. So like I said, I have two projects in the first quarter of the year. So when I see those with not a lot of white space in between them, I, you know, get a little nervous. And then you and I have a ship date in April. And I've got one over the summer. And I'm figuring out what the fall looks like.

Pete: Interesting.

Jen: But the being able to just see the major dates lets me know where I can sort of press on the gas pedal a little, and ask myself to really contribute a lot. And then where do I need to ease up a bit, because I have a long-term project coming up. Because sometimes there's a ship date, and there are only a couple weeks of work leading up to said ship date. And sometimes the ship date is in December, and I'm working on it now. And so I know that for that particular project, I need to pace things.

Pete: And this might be like individual specific, but for you, is it the idea you want one ship date per quarter? Is that just the number you landed on?

Jen: It tends to work out that way. But that's not a hard and fast rule. For example, in the summer when...the studio is very quiet in the summer, in terms of group classes, I could probably take on a bit more. So what I do take on at that point is sprint on the book, sprint on the book.

Pete: Mm-hmm, sprint on the book.

Jen: That tends to be what's happening during the summers. Meanwhile, haven't reached that finish line yet, but still working on it.

Pete: You're getting there, you're getting there. Alright, I like that. So, a year on a page for Jen Waldman. Hmm, okay.

Jen: Another thing I do at the beginning of every year, is we have a community event at the studio called the Kickstart.

Pete: Nice.

Jen: Where we get our community together, and identify what we as a group are working toward.

Pete: Ooh.

Jen: And it's just an opportunity (it's very informal), but it's an opportunity for people to put ideas on the table, and for us to sort of take the temperature of the community so we know really what's important to us as we begin a new year. And coincidentally, the beginning of the calendar year is also the beginning of audition season for the theater community. So it's a really great time to get focused on what matters, and what we're really working toward.

Pete: I love it. I feel like the, the idea of a Kickstart is kind of the whole point, to a degree, of everything we've spoken about so far. Is like, "Can I review what I've been doing well, and what I've not necessarily been doing well? Can I plan out some things for the next year, maybe some actions, in order to kick start the new year, and then continue to build on that momentum moving forward?".

Jen: Before we wrap up, I've been...I think we should maybe start a drinking game, or something.

Pete: [laughter] Okay?

Jen: Where, because it's 2020, like every time someone says, "It's the Year of Vision," we take a drink. But I do feel like...

Pete: Oh my gosh, I just got that. [laughter]

Jen: But as cheesy as it sounds, I'm grateful for 2020 being the year of vision, and you really can't look away from the metaphor. So my hope for us, Pete, is that we get really focused on our vision for the work we're doing...that we're able to get really clear with how we can show up in service of our listeners, help them find their vision so that we can all move forward toward the work we want to do, the change we're seeking to make, and the communities we're looking to build.

Pete: Yes. Which feels like an appropriate way to wrap-up: from two people wearing glasses, talking about 2020 vision, and how we need assistance in order to get there. And that is The Long and The Short Of It.